A week ago, I went to a Columbus Day tournament with my son as referees. We took advantage of being outsiders so we got a hotel room provided by the referee committee to referee there. My son did all ARs (8 in total) and I did a mix of centers and ARs over the weekend. It was fun and I got to try out my more quiet side of reffing since two people had recently remarked how chatty I was.
In my first game as a center, I really did not talk much at all. A lot of blowing my whistle for fouls or for admin stuff (like substitutions or the like) but no talking to players unless I absolutely had to. 10 minutes into the first half, a play in the box that the red coach goes crazy for a PK. I did not give it, did not even bellow a "NO!" which is what I normally do on a play that I am not going to call a foul on. Coach continues for a few seconds and when the ball goes out of play, I position myself close to the coach and make eye contact while doing the zipper across the lips. And I get an acknowledging nod. It worked!
For the rest of the game, it went well but I noticed something. At least for me, when I talk to players more, I am always adjusting my bar of what constitutes a foul and what doesn't as the game goes on, the tempo, the score, etc. I noticed I needed to adjust less when not talking. At least in my mind, the bar was less mobile. Maybe because I expressed less of what I was going to allow vs not allow? Not sure why.
In my other games, it was less effective and I had to walk over to coaches and tell them to pipe down in another game. I really wasn't focusing on doing the silent treatment so I didn't do it as effectively. I need to make sure that until I get it down pat and it is second nature that I really concentrate to make sure I am doing that. I just find it hard because it is not who I am truthfully. We will see if it works out in the long run, but I am going to try that, focus on not talking as much to players and coaches. It does give things a more professional vibe to my matches, but then to me it seems like it is more of a "job" and less "fun". We will see what works and what doesn't after I have had more time to work this angle.
Monday, October 20, 2014
Monday, October 6, 2014
Public Talking
Just when you think you can no longer learn new things at one's craft, things take a turn for the better. Over the last two weekends, two senior referees gave me the same piece of advice. Essentially, don't talk so much during certain parts of the game.
In the first instance, this was a senior referee who did very high levels and was stepping down, essentially, to do a U18 girls game. First, his threshold of fouls was essentially no blood no foul. When we spoke about the levels of competition, he stated that most people's threshold was a little lower and he was fine with that. I can see a lot of injuries coming from his games if man-management is not in the cards for him.
Still, he said that when he ARed my game (which was a U16 girls game) he thought I spoke too much, like when there was a throw in, and I would sometimes say, red throw or white throw, he said to never do that. The players have been trained to look at your hand signals so no need to give them verbal instructions or to say it out loud. I can see where that makes sense.
Then this last weekend, in a U12 match, I had another AR who I respected quite well tell me the same thing. Don't say it, let them figure it out, look at your signals instead. Get them to look at you instead of hearing your voice.
I guess the problem is that I do too many different age groups. That would never fly at the U10 level, even in travel and would certainly not fly in Rec at all, since most of them still need help figuring things out. But for the older age groups, it makes sense.
So on Sunday, my daughter played and her center was a State Referee. I paid attention to how much he spoke with the girls. Zero. I don't think he spoke a word to them. He would let his whistle do the communicating. Foul, whistle. Substitution, two short tweets. I want you to take 3 steps back, whistle.
I don't think I can do it quite like that, but I will focus on making more of my presence known through the whistle and less with chatting. Don't know how it will work out, because it is in essence, not who I am, but let's see how this goes.
In the first instance, this was a senior referee who did very high levels and was stepping down, essentially, to do a U18 girls game. First, his threshold of fouls was essentially no blood no foul. When we spoke about the levels of competition, he stated that most people's threshold was a little lower and he was fine with that. I can see a lot of injuries coming from his games if man-management is not in the cards for him.
Still, he said that when he ARed my game (which was a U16 girls game) he thought I spoke too much, like when there was a throw in, and I would sometimes say, red throw or white throw, he said to never do that. The players have been trained to look at your hand signals so no need to give them verbal instructions or to say it out loud. I can see where that makes sense.
Then this last weekend, in a U12 match, I had another AR who I respected quite well tell me the same thing. Don't say it, let them figure it out, look at your signals instead. Get them to look at you instead of hearing your voice.
I guess the problem is that I do too many different age groups. That would never fly at the U10 level, even in travel and would certainly not fly in Rec at all, since most of them still need help figuring things out. But for the older age groups, it makes sense.
So on Sunday, my daughter played and her center was a State Referee. I paid attention to how much he spoke with the girls. Zero. I don't think he spoke a word to them. He would let his whistle do the communicating. Foul, whistle. Substitution, two short tweets. I want you to take 3 steps back, whistle.
I don't think I can do it quite like that, but I will focus on making more of my presence known through the whistle and less with chatting. Don't know how it will work out, because it is in essence, not who I am, but let's see how this goes.
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