Too bad I can't make them all cry

This past weekend I worked both days with interesting stories on each day, mostly anecdotal stuff, nothing really hard core ref related, at least on Saturday. On Sunday (in my next post), there is more juicy ref content.

Saturday I was slated to work 3 matches, U12 and U10 boys in the local rec league. Not particularly complicated matches, but the interesting thing about rec matches is that the parents are always keeping score and that the disparity in the level of play is always something to consider since you want people to have fun but you have to be mindful that the really good players are going to stand out...

First story of the day was that I seemed to have a knack for making the boys cry. In the first match, one team has a breakaway and a defender runs stride by stride with the attacker and is yelling at him like a marauding Viking all the way down. The attacker does not flinch and scores, but after the goal, I told the boy that he cannot yell to attempt to distract the attacker and that in a regular match that would be a yellow card.

I am not sure if he misunderstood or if maybe I was not age-appropriate in my language (though my 10 year old son would have understood) but he immediately looked at me and started balling. I had to explain to the coach what I said to the boy and he did not return to the field till the second half. And without incident, so at least it was not that bad.

In the second match, there were two terribly mismatched teams. One was very good, with 2-3 players that could have easily played travel and the other was one that barely had the basic notion of what soccer was. On the latter team, there was one child who knew one thing, attack the ball, get the ball and the concept of not fouling in the process was somewhat fuzzy. I counted 5 fouls from him in the first half. In the second half, with him team down 3-1, he really started laying it on thick. When his foul count approached double digits, I told him I had just about had enough of his fouling (and in hindsight, I should have talked to him sooner) and then when he fouled again, I asked the coach to sub him out since this league does not permit yellow or red cards unless something terrible happens. He was subbed and started tearing up as he walked off the field. Fortunately, with only 3 minutes left in the match, he did not return.

For the last match of the day, I did not have any crier, so at least I had that going for me, but seriously, I have to make sure that I choose a lighter tone when addressing children. I guess I have that personality that can come off as gruff and the boys did not respond well to it. Another lesson learned.

As a side note, on the last match, it felt like we regressed into medival times or something similar. One the yellow team there were two boys with distinctly strange names. One boy was almost my height (5'9") and his name was Thor. Yes, as in Odin's son. And then there was another boy named Augustus. Nothing interesting about the match, but the names served as some comic relief as the rain started to come down towards the end of the match.

In my next installment, I will describe another learning experience I had in my son's travel match with the other team's coach.